Tettiweglib is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, all-knowing human.

Tettiweglib created a top quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Tettiweglib, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tettiweglib, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Tettiweglib's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tettiweglib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Tettiweglib on top of all buildings.

3. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

4. You must pray to Tettiweglib five times a day.

5. Never talk about aardvarks.