Fenbenhakwonwablabdim is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unjust seal.

Fenbenhakwonwablabdim created oxygen eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fenbenhakwonwablabdim, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Fenbenhakwonwablabdim, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Fenbenhakwonwablabdim's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Fenbenhakwonwablabdim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always wear orange.

5. Do not covet oxen.