Cumnuttbus is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, kind centipede.

Cumnuttbus created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cumnuttbus, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Cumnuttbus, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cumnuttbus' most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Cumnuttbus' Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always help sick porpoises.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Do not dye your hair yellow.

5. Never paint your back fawn.