Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, humorless unicorn.

Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig created dark energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate sheep.

2. Always look after injured capybaras.

3. Retreat if three otters approach from the west.

4. Do not hurt tapirs.

5. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Cimlikstik Damtargrap Vagafvig on top of all buildings.