Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, dishonourable dragonfly.

Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod created a charm quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Bastmotweglenpaklarpfod's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never feed onions to cats while wearing turquoise shirts.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Do not speak about apples.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.