Xinwit Ladfubfum is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, charitable crab.

Xinwit Ladfubfum created bats seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Xinwit Ladfubfum, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xinwit Ladfubfum, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Xinwit Ladfubfum's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Xinwit Ladfubfum's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Xinwit Ladfubfum five times a day.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

3. You must love Xinwit Ladfubfum.

4. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.