Nurttikart is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, amazing centipede.

Nurttikart created an up quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurttikart, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Nurttikart, it will strike you with lightening.

Nurttikart's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Nurttikart's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from blue aardvarks, for they are unholy.

2. Gulls are not to be trusted.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Put Nurttikart first in all things.

5. Never think about cell theory.