Begarmnigflat is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, thoughtless grasshopper.

Begarmnigflat created the Sombrero Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Begarmnigflat, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Begarmnigflat, she will manifest in front of you.

Begarmnigflat's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Begarmnigflat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Never mention aardvarks.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.