Fitlansug is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, tiresome weasel.

Fitlansug created the world six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitlansug, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fitlansug, she will curse you with boils.

Fitlansug's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Fitlansug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. You must love Fitlansug.

5. Never talk about fire.