Zigponzig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, cheerful owl.

Zigponzig created everything that exists seven million years ago.

If you believe in Zigponzig, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zigponzig, it will turn you into a rock.

Zigponzig's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Zigponzig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not eat pineapples.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not dye your hair pink.