Tip is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, weak meerkat.

Tip created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tip, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tip, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Tip's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Tip's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. You must pray to Tip three times a day.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. You must never eat coconuts.