Bifkardav Latdambonk is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, merciful jellyfish.

Bifkardav Latdambonk created the Andromeda Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Bifkardav Latdambonk, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bifkardav Latdambonk, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Bifkardav Latdambonk's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Bifkardav Latdambonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never feed cucumbers to turtles while wearing black boots.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not dye your hair green.

5. Never play with disobedient children.