Tadbedwod is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, annoying turtle.

Tadbedwod created vertebrates seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadbedwod, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tadbedwod, she will cry a lot.

Tadbedwod's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Tadbedwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nebulae.

2. Do not eat bananas.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never go into red rooms.

5. Always stare at clouds.