Jabjamab is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, kind goblin.

Jabjamab created Europe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Jabjamab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Jabjamab, she will turn you into a plant.

Jabjamab's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Jabjamab's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Jabjamab on top of all buildings.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never wear orange boots.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Do not stand on grass.