Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, awesome dolphin.

Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved created the Large Magellanic Cloud two years ago.

If you believe in Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. You must love Cunpindapyarlluncunjab Larnkabjantadved.

3. Retreat if eight mites approach from the south.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never look at comets.