Lunbendissfum is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, unselfish cobra.

Lunbendissfum created an up quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lunbendissfum, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Lunbendissfum, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Lunbendissfum's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Lunbendissfum's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never wear yellow corsets.

3. Always look after injured mites.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lunbendissfum.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.