Gundamhim Cubgebdid is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, idiotic jaguar.

Gundamhim Cubgebdid created a bottom quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Gundamhim Cubgebdid, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gundamhim Cubgebdid, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Gundamhim Cubgebdid's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Gundamhim Cubgebdid's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never hurt manatees.

3. Do not hurt tortoises.

4. Never write about stars.

5. Always help monkeys in need.