Vadratarmgubhapfunril is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, moody bear.

Vadratarmgubhapfunril created the planet Mars two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadratarmgubhapfunril, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadratarmgubhapfunril, he will turn you into a puffin.

Vadratarmgubhapfunril's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Vadratarmgubhapfunril's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Do not shave your face.

4. Run away if eight squirrels approach from the west.

5. Never sing near swans.