Vedbassab is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, omniscient bat.

Vedbassab created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Vedbassab, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Vedbassab, it will turn you into a plant.

Vedbassab's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Vedbassab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

2. Never paint your neck purple.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Never play with disobedient children.