Nakpaszog is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, ruthless porpoise.

Nakpaszog created a bottom quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nakpaszog, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Nakpaszog, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Nakpaszog's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Nakpaszog's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Nakpaszog six times a day.

2. Nakpaszog loves moths, so they must be respected.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not kill otters.

5. Never eat green fruit.