Botwat is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, benevolent tapir.

Botwat created silver eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botwat, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Botwat, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Botwat's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Botwat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat lemons.

2. Hide if five gulls approach from the south.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never talk about cell theory.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.