Tadspaglik is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, conceited wolf.

Tadspaglik created a Higgs boson five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tadspaglik, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tadspaglik, he will be very unhappy.

Tadspaglik's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Tadspaglik's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Horses are not to be trusted.

4. Never wear fawn hats.

5. You must love Tadspaglik.