Quagxucnibdad is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, bad-tempered bear.

Quagxucnibdad created the Andromeda Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quagxucnibdad, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Quagxucnibdad, it will turn you into a hamster.

Quagxucnibdad's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Quagxucnibdad's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat coconuts.

2. Never bounce near hamsters.

3. Always wear indigo.

4. Quagxucnibdad must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never write about gravity.