Nartcudort is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, generous meerkat.

Nartcudort created a charm quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Nartcudort, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Nartcudort, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Nartcudort's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Nartcudort's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about asteroids.

2. Retreat if four foxes approach from the east.

3. Do not dye your hair red.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Frogs are not to be trusted.