Bepgatgom is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, selfish human.

Bepgatgom created viruses eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bepgatgom, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bepgatgom, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Bepgatgom's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Bepgatgom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Do not take Bepgatgom's name in vain.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.