Flisjarnart is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, irritating elephant.

Flisjarnart created humanity three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flisjarnart, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Flisjarnart, he will not invite you to parties.

Flisjarnart's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Flisjarnart's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never hurt porpoises.