Capcunlooptetti is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, duplicitous finch.

Capcunlooptetti created a quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Capcunlooptetti, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Capcunlooptetti, she will have a low opinion of you.

Capcunlooptetti's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Capcunlooptetti's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Worship no other gods but Capcunlooptetti.

3. Never feed bread to eagles while wearing green trousers.

4. Never run near dogs.

5. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.