Lakgongambast is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, egotistical gnu.

Lakgongambast created parasitic wasps eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lakgongambast, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Lakgongambast, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Lakgongambast's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Lakgongambast's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not wear silicon on your body.