Rullkanshav is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, contented chinchilla.

Rullkanshav created carbon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rullkanshav, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Rullkanshav, he will turn you into a frog.

Rullkanshav's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Rullkanshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not run in public.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always make sure there are no mites in a building before entering it.

5. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.