Tadcabarn is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, sapient mink.

Tadcabarn created the world nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tadcabarn, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Tadcabarn, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tadcabarn's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Tadcabarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never wear coats.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate whales.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always stare at clouds.