Dobkopcen is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, pitiless yak.

Dobkopcen created time and space eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dobkopcen, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dobkopcen, it will curse you with boils.

Dobkopcen's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Dobkopcen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three silicon sculptures of Dobkopcen on top of important buildings.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Dobkopcen.