Metfet is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, pitiless jaguar.

Metfet created an up quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Metfet, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Metfet, he will send you a sign.

Metfet's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Metfet's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from fawn sheep, for they are unholy.

2. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never wear shirts.

4. Never talk about great tits.

5. Do not covet oxen.