Yatratkoncun is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, wise wombat.

Yatratkoncun created the planet Saturn nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yatratkoncun, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Yatratkoncun, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Yatratkoncun's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Yatratkoncun's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never run in the presence of great tits.

4. Never go into white rooms.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate horses.