Bapmiflop is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, humane faun.

Bapmiflop created a top quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapmiflop, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bapmiflop, she will be mildly annoyed.

Bapmiflop's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Bapmiflop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

2. Worship no other gods but Bapmiflop.

3. You must never eat beans.

4. Do not take Bapmiflop's name in vain.

5. Never eat parsnips.