Futdimcid is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, dishonourable dove.

Futdimcid created a photon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Futdimcid, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Futdimcid, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Futdimcid's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Futdimcid's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Futdimcid.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not kill seals.

4. Never eat cherries.

5. Hide from cyan goats for they are unholy.