Kikwabmut is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, astonishing coyote.

Kikwabmut created an atom six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kikwabmut, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Kikwabmut, she will not invite you to parties.

Kikwabmut's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Kikwabmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat peanuts.

2. Erect six nickel sculptures of Kikwabmut on top of important buildings.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Always help foxes in need.

5. Run away from blue monkeys, for they are unholy.