Flamlenlog is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, compassionate mole.

Flamlenlog created the Sun two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamlenlog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flamlenlog, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Flamlenlog's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Flamlenlog's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mites.

2. Never talk about hamsters.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never hurt cats.