Vinmabpakjatcad is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic naga.

Vinmabpakjatcad created a bottom quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vinmabpakjatcad, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vinmabpakjatcad, it will turn you into a hamster.

Vinmabpakjatcad's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Vinmabpakjatcad's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never think about amino acids.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.