Kapflanyart is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, ruthless fox.

Kapflanyart created the solar system nine million years ago.

If you believe in Kapflanyart, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Kapflanyart, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Kapflanyart's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Kapflanyart's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three horses approach from the east.

2. Never talk about nebulae.

3. You must never eat cucumbers.

4. Dolphins are not to be trusted.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Kapflanyart on top of all buildings.