Narl is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, astonishing dog.

Narl created humankind five billion years ago.

If you believe in Narl, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Narl, he will turn you into a rat.

Narl's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Narl's Holy Commandments

1. Put Narl first in all things.

2. Never paint your head green.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.