Zogtifdog is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, sage hippopotamus.

Zogtifdog created a photon five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogtifdog, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Zogtifdog, he will refuse to believe in you.

Zogtifdog's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Zogtifdog's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Do not sit in public.

3. Never talk about cell theory.

4. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.