Lanyarlbab is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unfair eagle.

Lanyarlbab created tapeworms three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lanyarlbab, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lanyarlbab, it will have a low opinion of you.

Lanyarlbab's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Lanyarlbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always help sick shrews.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not trade with those who eat cherries.

5. Never wear blue corsets.