Tettihap is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthinking narwhal.

Tettihap created a down quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tettihap, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tettihap, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Tettihap's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Tettihap's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat sheep with great respect.

2. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Never eat strawberries.