Wanvilflat is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, quiet seal.

Wanvilflat created gold six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wanvilflat, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Wanvilflat, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Wanvilflat's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Wanvilflat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Never look at planets.

4. Geese are not to be trusted.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.