Bagwipfig is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, strong narwhal.

Bagwipfig created a top quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagwipfig, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bagwipfig, she will turn you into a frog.

Bagwipfig's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Bagwipfig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about stars.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never look at planets.

4. Never mention hamsters.

5. Do not covet oxen.