Yattlogarf is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, conceited gorilla.

Yattlogarf created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattlogarf, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Yattlogarf, he will try to impress you with trees.

Yattlogarf's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Yattlogarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat nuts.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always help sick geese.

4. Feed all hungry squirrels.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.