Toflinpop is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, fussy wyvern.

Toflinpop created bats five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Toflinpop, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Toflinpop, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Toflinpop's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Toflinpop's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Retreat if eight great tits approach from the west.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Do not wear violet clothing.

5. Respect your elders.