Yaktancit is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, dishonourable mongoose.

Yaktancit created the Whirlpool Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Yaktancit, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Yaktancit, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Yaktancit's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Yaktancit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your legs.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Run away if five mice approach from the north.

5. Do not covet oxen.