Kop is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, loving zebra.

Kop created humankind two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kop, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kop, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Kop's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Kop's Holy Commandments

1. Always help otters in need.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

5. Do not cook food in pots.