Yarnuttsog is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, vain frog.

Yarnuttsog created gold two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarnuttsog, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Yarnuttsog, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Yarnuttsog's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Yarnuttsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about amino acids.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Never mention goats.

5. Never talk about porpoises.